Dec 9, 2011

One month...

One month from Sunday is Paxton's due date...our coming baby boy. It's seems so surreal. I actually have a baby inside of me and he's actually going to come out and be a real live person. It's amazing to me how billions of people have had babies and yet when it happens to you it seems like a completely new and foreign concept.

So, here we go! Wesley and I are about to become actual parents. I've been praying that we will be good ones. I know Wesley will be an amazing Father! He's so wonderful and Paxton couldn't ask for a better Daddy. I think I'm more excited about Wesley meeting him face to face for the first time than I am. Maybe because I've felt connected to Paxton from the beginning...since he's pretty much taken over my entire body!

We love you Paxton Wesley Douglas Perkins and we can't wait to meet you, hug you, squeeze you, kiss you and spoil you!!! You're going to be amazing.

Jun 15, 2011

Waiting in the Unknown

Sometimes the Lord gives us a clear promise. We hear His emphatic ‘yes’ or just sense it deep down inside. But other times we wait in the unknown. I’ve been trying to figure out the whole faith thing the past few months. When do I believe and trust everything will be okay and when do I just surrender and say, “Lord, not my will but Yours be done”?

It seems to me that we live in a sort of in-between. Even if we do believe that everything will turn out the way we hope we still have to be willing to surrender to the Lord’s will. I don’t think this is giving up; I think it’s living in complete submission that the Lord is sovereign and we are not.

So, here some of us are…waiting in the unknown not really knowing how things might turn out. But I can trust and believe that whatever does happen the Lord is good and He’s holding me through it all…good or bad. That might not make it easier for the time I’m in waiting, but it does give me hope that my waiting won’t last forever and I can trust the One who is waiting for me with open arms. The One who has a plan and a future for me even when I might not see it so clear; by faith, I know it’s there at the end of my waiting.

Jun 8, 2011

Thought Someone Else Might Enjoy This Too...

THE SECRETS OF THE LORD
by David Wilkerson

…Christ is the treasure chest in the field. And in him, I’ve found all that I’ll ever need. No more trying to find purpose in ministry. No more looking for fulfillment in family or friends. No more needing to build something for God, or to be a success, or to feel useful. No more keeping up with the crowd, or trying to prove something. No more searching for ways to please people. No more trying to think or reason my way out of difficulties.

I’ve found what I’m looking for. My treasure, my pearl, is Christ. And all that the Owner asks of me is, “David, I love you. Let me adopt you. I’ve already signed the papers with my own Son’s blood. You’re now a joint heir with him of everything I possess.”

What a bargain. I give up my filthy rags of self-reliance and good works. I lay aside my worn-out shoes of striving. I leave behind my sleepless nights on the streets of doubt and fear. And in return, I get adopted by a King. This is what happens when you seek the pearl, the treasure, till you find him. Jesus offers you everything he is. He brings you joy, peace, purpose, holiness. And he becomes your everything—your waking, your sleeping, your morning, afternoon and evening.

Mar 24, 2011

evil little things

So, outside of our house we have little demons flying around; they are called mosquito hawks. Or, crane flies which I just learned online. And the worst party of all is I’ve lived my life believing they eat mosquito’s and have come to learn the hard truth…they don’t! They are just horrible flying things with long creepy legs and eeeky weird wings that fall off and get stuck on things. I’m definitely asking God about these horrible creatures when we get to heaven and “why”? They don’t even eat mosquito’s! They eat decomposing leaves which could explain why we have dozens of them flying around our patio as dried up leaves have been lying there all winter. Oops.

Anyhow…it is now my new mission in life to kill these wicked insects of doom. I’m afraid to leave my house every morning because they are always there…waiting for me…to attack and get stuck in my freshly combed hair.

If anyone knows how to kill these things please leave a comment and let me know! The battle is on…

Mar 2, 2011

Humility

I've been thinking about humility a lot lately and found this writing by Ronald Goetz, a Century editor. This article appeared in the Christian Century in 1979. Anyhow, here is a little tid-bit from it that I found interesting:

Paul exhorts people to humble themselves because humility is an honest and objective reflection of our real relationship to God. The fact is that we are dependent. All that we have comes from God -- our lives, our salvation, our hope, our Christ. God has given all; nothing is our own. God gives; God will take away; God will give again. To be humble is not an act of self-effacement best cultivated by spending years in a monastery. It is a simple, objective recognition of the reality of God. Humility isn’t even a virtue, any more than to recognize that the sky is blue is a virtue. If God is God, then we are God’s creatures. To be humble toward God is to acknowledge what is both the most obvious fact and yet the most difficult admission: we are not God.

Feb 18, 2011

Joy, Sisters, and Mochas

"This is the day the Lord has made...I will rejoice and be glad in it!"

It's one of those days where this verse is a lot easier to say than other days. Maybe because it's Friday, maybe because I picked up a sugar free blended mocha this morning, maybe because I had great God time at 7 a.m., or maybe just becuase the Lord is just plain Awesome. I don't know, but it feels good to have the joy of the Lord exploding inside of me.

It's also my sister's birthday today. She is on my heart. I love her and I pray that she feels loved today...by me and most importantly by the Lord.

Thank you Lord...for all that you do and for everything you will do.

Jan 19, 2011

I Belong

These past few months have been filled with the quickest ups-and-downs I’ve had in a while. I’ve gone from thrilled…to nervous…to hopeful…to devastated…to faithful…to acceptance…to dependence…all in a short while. I think about how the Lord holds our hands through this life and what His comfort and guidance mean to me…

…everything.

One thing I know and keep learning in this life is that I would never want to live one second of the day without my Lord’s hand holding mine. He is my strength when I am weak. He is my hope when I have none left. He makes me happy.

Some people don’t like the idea of the Lord knowing our inner-most thoughts all the time; but this gives me peace. No one knows me more than the Lord and yet He still loves me. Isn’t that what we all truly desire…unconditional love? Aren’t we all looking for that special “someone” who will love us in spite of ourselves?

The Lord sees me and knows me…

…and I belong…

…not just to a 'something' or a 'someone'…

…but I belong to Him.