Oct 7, 2010

To Risk

I’ve been thinking a lot about dreams lately. Not the kind that plays in our mind at night, but dreams that we think about during the day.

When I was little I had many dreams. Most of them were the kind of dreams that only a five year old would have. But some of them are dreams that I still hold onto today. I believe that there are dreams that God places in us at a young age and continue to grow throughout our lives. They may disappear for a while, as if under a fog, but they are still there as soon as a little sun pops out.

The question is how far do we follow our dreams? Do we allow them to take us into uncharted territory? Do we allow them to bring us to places we never thought we would be and wonder if it’s just too risky? How risky is too risky?

We pray, we ask for wisdom, we seek counsel, we do everything we can logically do and then…we jump. We jump because if we don’t we might suffocate in the comfortable world we have created for ourselves. Or...we can just wander in the desert for forty years.

It’s true that it’s easier said than done to jump into the deep and unknown. But God brings us to places in our lives where the idea of jumping with Him sounds…impossible…but necessary. God knows we all have the tendency to “be safe” and choose to wander in the comfortable. I’m glad my God nudges me into the unknown. With Him life is never boring and it’s good to know that with my God I can do all things…even follow my dreams.

Sep 2, 2010

A New Perspective Today

Father, help me to have a new perspective today…Your perspective. Help me to look at my life and my circumstances through Your eyes. As You look down from above You see the full picture…the entire canvas. All I can see is one stroke. You see every color…every texture…every piece. You see how all of ‘this’ fits together.

Today, help me to see as You see. Help me to stop and take in deep breaths that bring Your goodness and Your peace. Yes, You see the whole picture and You have made it possible for me to join You; in knowing as You know.

Psalm 36:4-6
Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens,
your faithfulness to the skies.

Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains,
your justice like the great deep.

Aug 11, 2010

just hold your horses

Wesley and I were chatting outside on our lawn today at lunch. I had been cold all morning and the blazing sun made my entire body tingle with warmth. It was just what I needed. As we lounged on our blanket I mentioned how much I love the sound of the leaves rustling in the wind. Very relaxing.

That comment made Wesley think about the leaves and how they were already starting to fall in our yard. I then exclaimed, “I can’t believe it’s almost fall!” But then I started thinking about what I just said and how often we do that…jump to the next thing when it’s a ways off. It sounds a lot different to say, “Fall is almost here,” then, “Wow, we still have over a month left of summer!”

Realizing that we still have a month left of summer instead of thinking fall is almost here really made me feel different. It was quite calming actually.

So, I’m going to hang onto the fact that we still have plenty of summer left and that fall will get here in due time. So what if the leaves are starting to fall a little…maybe they just wanted to lay in the grass and soak up some rays with Wesley and me.

Aug 2, 2010

Together

This Sunday Wesley and I will have been married for two years. I can't believe how fast the time goes by! And yet, it feels like Wesley and I have always been married. It's been a FUN two years and I can't wait to see what the next fifty hold!

I was telling Wesley that there are things I'm willing to try and venture out in that I would never have tried on my own. He really helps me in the areas I feel weak. But I was also thinking how often we try to do things on our own when we really don't have to. It doesn't have to take a husband or a wife to always push us into something new and exciting. We can lean on friends, family, or a church body. Sometimes we feel God is calling us in a new direction but it can seem scary or just too big for us. My thought, maybe it is too big for just one person. Could it be that God is telling us to move forward but to not do it alone?

If something seems too big for just you, then grab a friend to help you in the areas you feel really weak in. God designed us to need others. Maybe God is asking us to step out in faith with a brother or sister in Christ who can help us along the way. Together, through Christ, who knows what could be accomplished!

Jul 22, 2010

Two Weddings and a Dress

I'm in two weddings this month. A couple of weeks ago I flew to Dallas, Texas to be in my wonderful friends wedding. Jordan Simpson is now Jordan Phillips...and a beautiful Jordan Phillips she is.

I'm in another wedding this weekend. My husband and I are driving up to Eugene, Oregon to be in Katie Newton's wedding. She will be a most magnificent bride as well...I'm sure.

The one interesting fact in this twin scenario is that they both picked the same bridesmaid dress! Can anyone say..."yaye"! Not only have I been blessed with wonderful friends that I can share life with; I also have been blessed with being able to wear the same dress in two weddings! For those of you that have been in a few weddings I'm sure you can understand my elation.

To my wonderful friends Jordan and Katie...

May your year be blessed with joy, wonder, and love. I'm so proud of you both and I know the Lord has many good things in store for you and your new husbands.

Marriage is such a wonderful thing when it's under the covering of the Lord. So, congratulations and have fun!

Jul 16, 2010

Happy Birthday!

Today is my birthday! The sun is shining, the grass is green, the orange and palm trees sway. (Wait a second, that's the beginning of a Christmas song.) Anyhow...it's a wonderful day!

Even though there are many things in my life I'd like to improve or change I have to say that I am totally and 100% blessed! God is so good. He is so good to me. His love and mercy and goodness truly have followed me all the days of my life and I know they will continue to follow me.

Thank you to my amazing husband, my family, my close friendships, and my church family...life would not be the same without your love and support. And most of all thank you to my Jesus, my Savior, my Everything.

Today is a good day. Yep,thirty-one years ago my Jesus breathed life into me and smiled because He saw that His creation was good :) Even when I don't always believe in me, Jesus does, and this gives me strength like nothing else. Ahhh yes...Jesus believes...in me. What can ever stand against that kind of power? Nothing.

Jul 6, 2010

Learning to Lean a Little Bit More

When I was taking a stroll with my mom today at lunch I was praying silently to the Lord asking him to help me straighten up. I’ve been irritable today and I’m not sure why. I want to enjoy myself and the people around me. I want to feel safe and secure and soak in the joy that comes from the Lord and from my very blessed life.

My first instinct is to blame my bad attitude on others, but it’s not their fault, it’s mine. Today I’m choosing to be annoyed, frustrated, and well…poopy. Today I’m choosing to freak out at all the things I want to control but can’t…and it’s driving me crazy!

People aren’t always going to be nice. Family will annoy us. Friends will come and go or replace us with someone new and “better”. Every day we might have to deal with feelings of rejection, sadness, anger, frustration, or hurt. But even the Son of God had to deal with these things...He understands...and He handled every hurt and frustration with complete humilty and love. Maybe I can lean on Him a little bit more and glean from His goodness and patience once again...

Isaiah 53:3-7

He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering.
Like one from whom men hide their faces
he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
4 Surely he took up our infirmities
and carried our sorrows,
yet we considered him stricken by God,
smitten by him, and afflicted.
5 But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed.
6 We all, like sheep, have gone astray,
each of us has turned to his own way;
and the LORD has laid on him
the iniquity of us all.
7 He was oppressed and afflicted,
yet he did not open his mouth;
he was led like a lamb to the slaughter,
and as a sheep before her shearers is silent,
so he did not open his mouth.

Jul 2, 2010

Holiday Weekend Here I come!

Well...haven't posted in a while. It's July...can't believe it. Where does the time go? I'm ready for my three day holiday weekend. I'm looking foward to family, friends, fun, and Jesus. My mission: to relax and try my hardest to not stress about anything...

...mission impossible?

We will see how I feel on Tuesday, but I'm pretty sure it says somewhere that I can do all things through Christ and that nothing is impossible with Him. That promise definitley increases my odds of succeeding!

May 14, 2010

He Delights

My husband took today off. His brother, Tom, is getting married tomorrow so Wesley took the day off to help set up for the wedding. (Isn’t he so sweet?) So, last night I turned to Wes and said, “You get to sleep in tomorrow!” He replied with an enthusiastic, “I know!”

This morning I got out of bed a little before 6 a.m. When I came out of the bathroom to get something I see that our bed is empty. “Wesley?” I yell out. My husband pops around the corner and says, “I’m here!” So much for sleeping in! Wesley was up and bopping around at 6 a.m. this morning on his day off. Such a silly head.

Not really sure why I’m writing this except that I found it amusing. I love it when God’s kids live full of life and joy. And that’s what my husband reminded me of this morning. His face was beaming and he was up and ready to seize the day…even on his day off! I believe God delights in our joyful, child like hearts. I know I do.

We may not always have cheery mornings like Wesley had today; but when we do I know God is joining in on the fun as he laughs and watches us with delight…

“He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.” Psalm 18:19

Apr 30, 2010

Jesus noticed

We say we do things for “Jesus” but do we always really? When we don’t get a “thank you” or “good job” doesn’t it irk us? I know time and time again I have to lay down my need for approval, that is, man’s approval. I tell myself I did “this or that” for Jesus but then when someone doesn’t notice how hard I worked at something I get a little peeved.

But Jesus noticed…

…and this brings a smile to my heart because in the end I really did want to do it just for Jesus. When I realize His approval is the only thing that truly matters I breathe a sigh of relief. I align myself once again, repent of my pride and thank Him for the grace to endure the “thankless” jobs. Because in the end I know that the “thankless” jobs are what bring Him the most glory.

Apr 15, 2010

A Merry Heart

Proverbs 17:22 (NKJ)
“A merry heart does good, like medicine,
But a broken spirit dries the bones.”

Isn’t it great to know that a merry heart is good for us? I don’t know about you, but it gives me great relief to know that being merry is not just a fun thing, but God’s Word says it’s good for me.

Sometimes I find myself being really intense. I know a lot of it is just my personality, I’m an intense person, but often I can be too serious. At times I’ve really needed someone to slap me in the face and say, “Hey…chill out…it’s gonna be okay.”

Yeah…I should chill out…it will be okay and God loves me and He thinks I’m pretty amazing. He wants me to smile, relax, and to not freak out. Go figure.

A merry heart sounds like too much fun to pass up on...I think I might try it more often...and take a few more chill pills.

Apr 13, 2010

once again

God likes to give me life themes.

Lately it’s two words…”let go”. (He ususally makes it simple like this because he knows me...I need simple.)

They seem like easy words to follow…just let go! Be free! La-la-la! But, isn’t it a lot harder than it sounds?

But I feel like I’m slowly, and I mean slowly, learning how to let go and let God.

This morning I decided to let go of another “thing” that has really been weighing on me. It’s one of those things that just nag at you and you can’t control it but you keep trying to. Do you know what I mean? Well, this morning I decided I’m done. I really am going to let go. And guess what? I feel a lot better! (And no, I didn’t let go of paying my mortgage or anything like that!)

All I have to say is…God is really smart. When I actually get it through my thick skull to listen and trust…things go a lot smoother. My circumstances don’t necessarily change, but my thinking does and my joy expands.

God…really smart.

Apr 7, 2010

1 comment

I log on to my computer, check my emails, respond, and then I make another click to a regularly visited website with anticipation to what I seek...

I admit it...I love it when people leave comments on my blog page. When I see those little lit up words that read "1 comment" I get all giddy inside. I can't help it. I just want to know someone is actually reading what I write. Even if they hate it...at least I know someone is noticing.

Am I vain?

Don't answer.

To all my blog followers out there who leave comments (mainly Marci)...thank you! You brighten my day and give me hope that my blog page isn't just another site in the vast sea of the web.

Mar 31, 2010

wrinkles

I wonder what makes us push and strive for beauty? Is it the media? Is it insecurity? Is it competition with other beautiful women? What is it that drives us to madness? (Or with some women they can’t take the pressure anymore and just throw in the towel with make-up and tweezers to follow.)

I think deep down each girl knows…in the very depths of her soul that she was meant to be beautiful. We just don’t quite understand how. We know and hear inner beauty is more important than outer beauty…we even read it in the Bible so we know it’s true. But it also talks about the physical beauty of a Beloved in Psalm of Psalms…or the beauty of Rachel, Sarah, Esther, and Bathsheba. So, someone noticed these women’s features and put them down on paper for goodness sake!

So what does this all mean? I’m still figuring it out. But I think I’m learning that it’s okay to want to be beautiful as long as I’m not consumed with it. I will grow old. I will wrinkle. My hair will turn gray (underneath the dye of course). And my skin will sag (yikes).

But nothing can top an elderly women whose smile can light up a room and make the youngest of men blush in awe of their wisdom, character, and yes...beauty.

I do long to be beautiful and I will always pamper myself…even when I’m 100. But I also look forward to the day when my gray hair and laughing lines light up the room because Jesus is behind it all.

Mar 15, 2010

His Warmth

There is something beautiful that the sunshine does…it makes me smile inside and I feel like everything is going to be okay. When the warmth of the sun kisses my face after a long, gray winter, I close my eyes and just soak it in. It rejuvenates me and gives me strength.

Yeah…everything…all of it will be okay.

Jesus is the Son of God. I just love how powerful the earth’s sun is, but think how much more powerful God’s Son is? When Jesus kisses my face with His love and warmth I really know everything is going to be okay. His love fills me inside and out and He gives me strength I know does not come from me.

So, I thank God for these Spring days when the sun starts to shine it’s warmth and it’s rays give out hope. But oh, how much more I love Jesus’ warmth and his rays of love, power, and strength that can shine even on the cloudiest of days.

Feb 26, 2010

Olympics, Mom, and God

My mom is a die hard Olympic fan. Since the 2010 Olympics started she has stayed up every night to at least midnight to watch them. She loves the Olympics. I would be there right along with her except that Wesley and I don’t have a TV. Wes and I watched it last night though…with my mom. She was so tired I had to keep waking her up. Poor thing. She wanted so badly to watch the figure skating which just happened to be the last event they aired…of course. It didn’t start until 11pm.

“Mom…mom…Mom…MOM…MOM !!!”

NO response. She was dead out…sleeping like a baby. Finally I shook her and she slowly opened her eyes.

“Mom…the women’s final program is starting.”

She summoned every ounce of energy she had, sat up, and watched all six girls skate as well as the medal ceremony at the end. She looked so tired but she would not give up! You go mom!

God’s like that too…like my Mom. He’s relentless. He’s our number one fan and even if he’s dead tired (figuratively speaking) he will summon every ounce of energy He has to cheer us on to the end. He cheers us on even if we don’t medal. None of the USA girls medaled last night by the way…but my mom still watched them skate…she still cheered USA on and gave those girls her undivided attention.

Like I said…God’s like that too…He gives us His undivided attention even when he knows we won’t always come out on top. He just loves to watch us shine, and we don't have to be gold medal winners to shine like a star.

Feb 19, 2010

Late

I was upset yesterday…with God…because He didn’t give me what I asked for.

It seems silly now but I was running late and all I really wanted at that time was green lights and a great parking spot right by the entrance door. I mean, my friend was waiting for me and I was asking God in my most sweetest way.

“What! Another red light? Seriously?”

Okay…I might be hitting every red light but maybe God will give me the most amazing parking spot ever and it will make up for all the time I’ve lost. Of course…that’s what He’ll do!

Nope.

I had to park a block away and run to the restaurant. What’s the deal? Doesn’t God care that I didn’t want to be late? It wasn’t even my fault that I was running late…it was miscommunication! Come on!

After some thinking and soul searching I realized I may have been acting a little bit spoiled. Okay…a lot spoiled. Just because I ask for something doesn’t mean God has to give it to me. And the big clincher is…everything He does is good and perfect. So it was actually good for me that I didn’t get what I asked for at that time. Ugh.

Doesn’t it always seem to come back to trust? I have to trust that God loves me and does what’s best for me even when I’m running late and getting stuck behind the slowest driver’s in America and hitting every red light in the universe and having to park a mile away from the front door! Yes…even then God loves me and is taking care of me.

Could it be that learning trust and patience is more important than getting what I always want? Hmmmm….

Feb 17, 2010

I think I can, I think I can

I’m on a mission…

to think…

more positively.

It’s a lot harder than I thought it would be! I’m starting to realize how often I entertain negative thoughts when I don’t even realize it. You know, like woe-is-me thoughts. Jesus commands us to think about things that are true, lovely, pure, noble, and good. So when I think about depressing thoughts or woe-is-me thoughts I’m actually disobeying Him. Eeek.

So, like I said…I’m on a mission. I’m trying to be more aware of what I’m dwelling on. Am I thinking something negative or positive? Am I entertaining a thought that is uplifting or dragging me down? Am I being mean to myself by thinking how awful I am or how wonderful God has made me to be? Am I thinking how wonderful God made you to be?

It’s hard always trying to think positive…but it has to be possible since God tells us to do it. So…here I go!

Feb 9, 2010

To Change

I think one of the things that I fear the most is the possibility that the older I get the less I will want to change. That scares me. I don’t want to be one of those old people who are “set in their ways”. I look at myself now and I see all this “stuff” that needs to go away, needs to change, needs to grow and I can tell it’s going to take a while. I can’t afford to become hard hearted because I have a lot of renewing to do and transforming to undertake.

Lord, I pray that I will always be willing to change and grow. I want to become more like You and I realize that it’s going to take a long time. My heart’s desire is to be changed by the power of your blood and to never ever stop.

Feb 5, 2010

Happy Day!

It's sunny outside today! Oh bliss. They said it was going to rain for the next thousand days...but they were wrong! The sun is kissing my face and making me all joyful and fuzzy inside. We should all go outside and twirl or something!

Feb 3, 2010

My Dream

Does everyone have a dream? Does everyone have this burning desire inside of them that they always return to? It seems like I'll be content for a while, maybe even months or years, and then I always return back to my dream. It's this constant nagging inside of my heart, almost as if it's a living part of me.

Curious what my dream is? I'm curious what your's is, but for now I think I'll just let mine float in the air around me. Because, I know you have a dream too, and I think it would be grand if all our dreams could float around together and make friends without competition.

May all our dreams come true. There is room enough in this world for all of us and our dreams to succeed and succeed well.

Jan 26, 2010

Really, Really

For the past couple of months God has been gradually building a word in my heart…meditate. It keeps creeping into my thoughts and in scriptures and in what people say and what I read. It’s been everywhere! I just love it when God does that. I love it when He speaks to us over time and through different venues until we go…aha!

I think most of us can say that we know meditating on God's Word is important and that we should do it. But how many of us really do it on a regular basis? I mean...really, really do it until it seeps down into our bones and we literally feel as though we are part of the Scripture? I realize how I can read the Word and not always meditate on it, chew it, savor it, and contemplate it. I love to read God’s Word because I know, that I know, that I know it’s Truth…but I still at times rush through it, thinking that somehow it will just soak into my heart because I really want it to.

All throughout scripture it speaks about meditating on God’s Word and on His character. I think it’s pretty important for us to not just discipline ourselves to read God’s Word daily but also to really think about it…all day long. Isn’t it better to understand and meditate on one scripture than it is to read three chapters and not remember any of it?

Psalm 119:15
I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways…

Jan 22, 2010

Beer Bottles

As I was driving down the road today I saw a guy crouching down grabbing frantically at something that had fallen onto the pavement. Broken glass bottles lay all over. They were beer bottles. At least a dozen had hit the surface and exploded. I saw him grab one as he tried to gulp down the remaining contents.

It was sad, but it was also a little humorous. I know...it shouldn't have been. Poor guy. He did look pitiful. I can't say I understand how he felt since I don't drink alcohol but I can imagine for him it was a pretty traumatic event.

I'm not as horrible as I sound...I did say a prayer for him as I drove away...

But, I guess he did learn his lesson today. Don't walk a long distance with a huge box of full beer bottles...or at least next time get cans.

Jan 1, 2010

2010

Another new year has begun...

I'm wondering what will happen in this new year to come. What changes will occur and what things will stay the same? It's good to have both change and consistency; I don't know if we could live a healthy life without one or the other.

I'm very thankful for the many, many blessings the Lord has given me. I know I could not count them all, especially since many blessings are unseen. God takes care of me and He gives me above and beyond what I need...because He loves me.

It's easy for us...for me to dwell on the negative...but there is so much more to be thankful for. I pray that the Lord's goodness would truly follow me all the days of my life and that I would forever sing His praises. Here's to a new year full of hope and possibilities from a God that is full of surprises.