A Bright Light

In the midst of darkness a light shines. In the middle of a lost, hopeless world, God's brightness penetrates every evil thing. There is power in the name of Jesus. There is hope in the name of Jesus. There is authority in our prayers and a promise behind them. "The prayers of a righteous person are powerful and effective."

The more years behind me, the more life I live, the more I realize that God means what He says. It's never too late. It's never too hopeless. Our prayers do make a difference. Lives can be changed. Hearts can be mended. Brokenness can be healed.

"Those walking in darkness have seen a great light."

God's Love

When I did something "bad" as a child I knew my mom would still love me. I was never afraid that I would do something so horrible that she would not want to take care of me, bless me, or hold me. When did I ever allow myself to start believing that my heavenly Father wasn't the same? I sin and cringe, wondering what punishment I will receive from God. What will he take away? What will he do to correct me? What will he with hold?

I don't have to fear. I can trust that my God loves to take care of me, loves to bless me, even loves to prove His love for me when I do mess up. He's not out to get me. He cherishes me. He wants me to succeed, to be happy, to feel loved and protected. He wants more for me than I could ever imagine. So much more.

My Panda

When I get to heaven I'm going to have my very own panda bear. I've known this for a while. He is going to be cute, fluffy, clean, and soft. I am going to ride him everywhere I go and anyone who wants to ride with me on my panda is more than welcome. Sometimes when I'm sad I think about heaven, how wonderful it's going to be, and about my panda. I truly believe in my heart that one of the first things I'll see in heaven, besides my Beautiful Lord, friends and family, is my sweet panda. I picture Jesus and I riding my bear next to a crystal stream in a grassy meadow. I'm holding onto Jesus and we are looking at everything around us, taking it in all in.

Heaven is going to be amazing. It makes me tear up just to think about all the wonderful things awaiting me. I wonder, what you are going to have in heaven? I know Jesus has my panda already picked out for me, and I completely trust His choice. He is going to be amazing.

She Prayed...

She closed her eyes to breathe in. She knew she needed something, she just didn't know what. She took a sip of her warm tea and snuggled up to her blanket. It was warm inside her home...safe. She was grateful. She prayed to the Lord that He would understand when she didn't. She prayed to the Lord to show her the way when the road seemed unclear. She prayed that He would hear her heart when she didn't know what to say or how to say it. She prayed that he would draw near when she was afraid. She breathed in. Safe and warm, she fell asleep.

Learning to Love

One of the hardest realities to accept in life is that we can't force others to love us. We have to simply love them and hope they will love us in return. We have to learn to trust, believe and rest. I've spent many years worrying about the one's I love not loving me back. I've wasted hours fretting that their words of love will come back empty, leaving me abandoned and alone.

If my love was perfect then there would be no fear, for perfect love cast's out all fear. I have to allow Christ to love through me, a sacrificial love that I receive from Him daily. I have to give my love to others without any expectations.

Like I said, one of the hardest lessons in life is learning we can't force others to love us in return. But, when we find out the ones we love do love us and we choose to trust instead of fear, nothing in life is sweeter.

"Remember Surrender" by: Sara Groves

Remember surrender
Remember the rest
Remember that weight lifting off of your chest
And realizing that it's not up to you and it never was

Remember surrender
Remember relief
Remember how tears rolled down both of your cheeks
As the warmth of a heavenly Father came closing in

I want to do that again
Why can't I live there
And make my home
In sweet surrender
I want to do so much more than remember

Remember surrender
Remember the peace
Remember how soundly you fell fast asleep
In the face of your troubles your future
still shone like the morning sun

Remember surrender
Remember that sound
Of all of those voices inside dying down
But One who speaks clearly of helping
and healing you deep within

I want to do that again
Why can't I live there
And make my home
In sweet surrender
I want to do so much more than remember
Remember
Oh surrender

by: Sara Groves

I saw many things while I was in Paraguay. I ponder what I learned while I was there and what I can take with me as I return to my routine at home. The team I went with, the people I spent 12 days with were amazing. As a team we did more than any of us could have done alone. We loved sick children. We built them a swing set, a playground and made them tables and cabinets. We offered them medicine and hugs. But most of all, we offered them hope. I've learned that hope is a gift. Hope gives life. Hope sustains us. Without hope people perish. We worked hard while we were there, but the impact of what we did doesn't even come close to the impact that God's hope can give.

So, I keep asking myself this question. How can I offer hope? It might be different in each place. In Paraguay an aspirin or a touch on someone's shoulder offers a hope that someone might not understand in the U.S. But, hope needs to be shed everywhere. Jesus' love needs to be shown.

I thank the Lord for giving me the gift of Paraguay. I thank Him for allowing me to meet amazing new people there, where language held no barrier. I thank Him that I got to spend 12 days with people that amazed me and gave me encouragement and love. I thank Him that we worked hard and were blessed to see the fruit of our labor and anticipate even more.

There's really so much to say about our trip. But, I'll leave with this...through Christ's love all things are possible. I can't wait to see what He has in store for those who trust in Him.

Off to Paraguay!!!

Well, I'm off to Paraguay tomorrow! I have no idea what to expect, but I'm very excited about what God is going to do. Thank you, for all your prayers and support! I will write a detailed blog when I return of how our adventure in Paraguay went. I'm not taking my digital camera but will try and get some pictures on here to share. I attatched a couple photos of where we will be going that I got off the internet. We'll be checking the kids for various diseases and doing what we can with the medical supplies we are carrying with us. There are a few other projects we will be working on while we are there as well. Pray that God gives a double portion and that we have enough for everyone who comes to us. God can multiply anything!

I'll be back in two weeks! Adios!

God Made the Trees

About a year ago I was Christmas shopping. The place was packed and the customers were elbow to elbow. In the corner of my eye I noticed a cute brown-headed little girl with her mom. As her mom swiftly went from one rack to the next the girl tagged along. She was quiet, until she spoke.

"Hey mom!" she shouted out. She did startle a few older women but it didn't take long for them to resume their focus. She persisted. "HEY MOM!"

"Yes, hunny", the mom said while shuffling through some shirts.

Little Girl took that as her cue to continue.

"Did you know that GOD made worms? And MOM! Did you know that God made the grass? MOM! Did you know that God made the sky and the trees?"

While the rest of the customers tuned the little girl out, including her mother, I stared at that brown-headed girl in wonder. She was announcing God's goodness and stating how he had made everything that she loved. No. She wasn't stating it, she was yelling it out oblivious to any thoughts of ridicule or rejection. She had good news and she wanted her mom to share in it. She wasn't about to let her revelation of God's creation go unnoticed. I mean really...take a minute...think about it.

GOD MADE THE TREES!

Pretty cool if you ask me.

Crunchy Leaves

She crunched through the fallen leaves all golden and brown. How she loved Fall; it was her favorite. The smell of chimney's and the brisk cool air on her cheeks made her heart warm. She waved at Mr. Peal and he waved back as if they knew what the other was thinking. She always liked Mr. Peal; he seemed like a happy man. Cookies awaited her at home but she lingered as the sky grew dim. Nothing could take her joy away today. She crunched another leaf and stuffed her hands in her pocket. How she loved Fall.

Worry Shmirry

Jesus says to not worry about anything, and yet we all do. I spend so much wasted time and energy worrying about things I can't control because I'm afraid of what "might" happen. What if? What if I allow myself to trust and get abandoned again? What if I can't make enough money? What if I end up old and alone? What if I never live up to the potential the Lord intented? What if I make a life changing mistake? What if I fail? What will people think? What if this is it? What if my dreams never come true?

On and on and on...right?

In the back of my mind I can hear the Holy Spirit saying, "Do not worry, do not fret. I will take care of you." How easily I push the voice of truth out of my mind and choose to let the enemies voice in.

So, what is there to say? I guess we all worry. We all have fears, hurts and issues. We all do. But, God promises to take care of us. He promises to turn any situation into something good, something beautiful even. He turns our ashes into beauty. So, let us throw away the lies of the enemy and grab onto hope. Let us grab onto truth. Let us cling to the good and reject the bad. We're all in this thing called life together. If I can do it, believe me, anyone can.

Bitter Sweet

You can ask anyone...Ashland is a very strange place. But there is a unique quality about it that draws you in. I strolled downtown Ashland today with coconut ice cream in hand. I enjoyed the sun on my face as my ice cream dripped down the side of my cone. Meandering my way through Lithia park I smiled at everyone I passed by. Of course most of them ignored me, but some smiled back and that seemed to satiate my need for human contact.

It's always kind of bitter sweet doing things alone. On the one hand I love spending time alone and just savouring the moment. On the other, I always end up seeing something funny or really special that makes me want someone to share it with. Yet, I always come back to the conclusion that being alone is crucial. Solitude forces us to be content with ourselves and our relationship with God. It also opens our eyes to things, people and nature that I don't think we'd see when accompanied by another. Some of the greatest and most important conversations I've had have been with total strangers that God placed on my path when I was alone. Often the greatest sunsets, rainbows, or stormy clouds were noticed when I was alone.

Like I said...bitter sweet. Without some sorrow how would we ever know the sweetness of joy?

Home Again...

To my Texas Girls! Love you sooo much! I had so much fun and I am so glad you are a part of my life! Thanks for being my friends and always knowing how to put a smile on my face.

Texas...Day 4

It's my last morning in Texas. I strolled out of bed with 12 hours of sleep under my belt. I crashed last night. I was exhausted. Jordan pours me a cup of coffee and I sit comatose on their rocking chair while I stare off into the distance. Boy, I'm gonna miss them.

After I get some caffeine in me and allow the blood to disperse through my veins more evenly I realize I'm hungry and head for the pantry. I toast myself, Jordan and Ashley some cinnamon bread and we discuss the plans for the day until my flight heads out. I'm excited to be with them, sad to say goodbye.

As the morning slowly fades into the afternoon I realize I need to start packing my stuff up and get ready. Jordan says, "Why don't you just stay. All you have to do is miss your flight, it's as easy as that." I laugh and think what pandemonium that would be to shirk my life in Grants Pass. I don't even want to think about it.

It's at least good to know that all it takes to live somewhere are people you love. I could live in Timbuktu for the rest of my life if it was with people I care about and who care about me. Home is definitely where the heart is. Luckily, my heart is easy to transport around. :)

Texas...Day 2

It's past 3am and I look at Ashley with a glazed over stare. We both smile and realize that for the past five hours we've come up with the same conclusion we knew five hours earlier. "Somehow, I feel better though," Ashley says as she hugs a pillow.

"Yeah, me too," I nod and giggle.

We all have fears, doubts, frustrations and times of weakness. But what I've come to learn and to understand is everything in life continually brings us back to one question. "Do I really believe in God?"

Is His word true? Are His promises true? All His promises inluding the one's where He says we will suffer and know pain. If I say I believe then I have to accept all of Him. If I say I believe I have to live through the good and the bad. If I say I believe then I have to keep trusting even if I never receive what I desire.

"Do I really believe?"

I'm thankful to have friends in my life that are willing to spend five hours of their time with me only to arrive where we started. Yet, with deeper understanding and more determination then before we can still say..."Yes, I do believe."

Texas...day 1

Hope is like a seed, it needs to be watered, cultivated and nurtured with care. I talked to a man today that had given up on hope. I knew from God that is was by no accident that he sat next to me on a three hour plane ride. I don't believe in accidents. So, with obedience I listened to God's voice and breathed truth into our conversation. God wanted to cultivate his dry, hard ground and spring up new life.

Hope is passed from one person to the other. I came to Texas today to spend time with people that God so graciously placed in my life. They offer me hope. They water the seed that lives inside of me and spur it on towards growth.

People die without hope. Our entire existence surrounds hope. Without hope there is no faith. We hope in the things we cannot see. We have faith. Faith is the very foundation of our relationship with God. Paul said the most important things are faith, hope and love. Is it no wonder these are the very things the enemy wants to destroy in us?

May the God of peace fill you with hope and breathe new life into dry and weary bones.

Classical Beauty

When I was young I would sit and listen to classical music for hours. I would close my eyes as I lay on my bed and imagine something magical, mysterious…ethereal. The music would dance inside my soul and make my mind wander to distant lands, places and people. I had a friend who thought it was so odd that I would listen to classical music when most kids our age were bopping their heads to New Kids on the Block and Michael Jackson. (Am I dating myself here?) But when she came over and I cranked up the classical tunes she soon began to fall helplessly under its spell. So, then both of us would lay flat on our backs, eyes closed, and imagine wonderful adventures, peaceful gardens and ancient lands.

Now that I’m a little bit older I still get sucked into the music that makes my imagination soar. I sit here and peer out the window into the lush greenness of Oregon and soak in Bach. Life can’t get much better than this. The melody, the notes, the passion behind the music makes me believe the one who wrote it truly knew how to live. It makes me think he understood the importance of each moment. It makes me believe he didn’t rush through life, running here and there but soaked in each minute with gratitude. I close my eyes and let the music absorb into my skin. Heavenly.

Breathe

I love to sit in silence and breathe in God. Have you ever done that? Just closed your eyes and breathed Him in? He's there. He's in our breath...in our very being.

I imagine Him sitting with me, watching me, listening to every word I say. He listens carefully and doesn't make a move. His eyes are on me and He reads between every line, every fear, every apprehension. I can't hide from Him and this brings me comfort instead of fear.

He's here. He cares. He listens and acts on my behalf. He wants me to live a life of freedom.

What makes me doubt? What makes me break the silence? Why do I let go of His presence?

I close my eyes and rest my head on His shoulder. He never leaves my side. He never walks away. Always there. Always safe. I breathe Him in and I know He is good.

Favorite Things

It's starting to feel like Fall. Cool breeze. Colors change ever so slightly into those warm musky colors that make me want to snuggle up to something cozy. The beginnings of hot chocolate, comfy blankets and movie nights while it's raining outside. I love this time of year. I love watching the kids go to school with their new clothes and back packs on...all wide eyed and giddy with the new year. Pumpkins are getting ready to poke their orange goodness onto the world so we can carve them into creative faces. "Hello Pumpkins!"

I think God likes Fall. I usually think God likes everything that I like. But, since He is my bestfriend He would naturally love everything that I love. His favorite things would be Fall, peanutbutter, ice cream, rainbows on a slighty sunny day, cute little kids with pudgy little faces, stars at night, the ocean with all of it's mysteries, fluffly green trees, laughing, hugging, and everything that makes me wanna smile.

But nothing makes God happier than the people that make all these things worth while. What good is ice cream if you don't have anyone to share it with? What good is a gorgeous rainbow if you're all alone to see it? And hugging is pretty near impossible without someone to hug. The things I cherish in life are all the more dear to me when I'm with the people I love and care about. Friends, family, heck... even nice strangers, make the day's worth while.

Yea, these are definitely God's favorite things.

Angels on Earth

Two angels flew down,
they swooped me up and carried me.

When my light was growing dim,
their love grew brighter.

Sent from God above,
sent because He loves me.

Two beautiful angels flew down,
His love shines through them.

dedicated to Ash and Jordan :)

Never too Late

Jesus was 30 years old when he started his "ministry". Jesus was crucified at the age of 33. He basically turned the world upside down in a small span of three years. I find this wonderfully amusing. Many of us, myself included, feel like we should have accomplished a million things by the time we reach 30 years old. We should have a husband or wife, kids, a mortgage and a dog named Winky.

If Jesus changed the entire world in just three years think of the things we can accomplish. Jesus said that we will do even greater things then He. All things are possible through Jesus. He has promised to do more than we can ever hope for or imagine. Three years. Think about it. Think about what God wants to accomplish through us if we would just let him.

It's never too late and it's never too early. Jesus was 30 when he began to change His world. Joseph was 30 when he became Potiphar's top man. Moses was...well old when he began to lead the Israelite's out of Egypt. Noah was old when he finished the ark. David went through many years of struggle before he actually became King to which he was promised.

We can't give up. We can't allow the voice of the enemy or the opinions of others to say it's too late or that there's not enough time left. Three years! Jesus made history. Think what we can do if we just trust God and allow him to do what He does best. He takes the little that we have and turns it into something huge.

It's never too late.

Peeking In

Guilt sneaks in like a slimy snake. Unoticed. Quiet. She was having a good week but there was this nagging tug in the back of her mind. She couldn't quite place her finger on it, but it was there and it was slowly creeping in wanting to take over. She focused on a small crack at the top of the ceiling. She wondered how long it had been there. She closed her eyes and ran through her week. Had she wronged someone? Had she done something she forgot to repent for? She opened her eyes again and refocused. Tired, she slowly got off the couch and walked over to the kitchen to pour herself a cup of coffee.

She thought about the person she was, the person she wanted to be and the person she didn't want to be. Was she striving for perfection? No. Only God is perfect. Then what was she striving for? She took a sip of her coffee and plopped back on the sofa. She grabbed her Bible and opened up the tattered book. Asking for wisdom she ruffles through the pages until she finds her favorite passage. She runs her fingers across the letters and breathes in deeply.

Truth.

Mindy Loo

Mindy Loo, My Mindy Loo
How wonderful you are!

You brighten up my hum drum day,
You are a shining star!

You come and go like winter snow,
Away, away you fly.

Don't worry little heart of mine,
for soon no more goodbyes!

Mindy Loo, My Mindy Loo
How wonderful you are!

Can't wait to see your smiling face,
You are my shining star!

Love you Mindy!!! Be safe!

I'm Awake Now!

Life really is nothing like I thought it would be. Yet...how does one predict one's life? It's kind of funny if you think about it. Our predictions are pretty much all the things we would want to happen. How convenient and incredibly boring we are. I say my life has turned out nothing like I thought it would, but what I should really say is, "My life should have happened just like this!"

It's so nice when I allow God to direct my day. I'm always amazed by the numerous blessings He pours over me when I'm not only searching for the things I want. I might say to myself, "Wow, this day happened nothing like I thought it would!" Or I might say, "Wow, this day was awesome and I'm so glad I was not in control of it!"

What am I really asking? Am I really wanting my life to turn out the way I want it to? Am I really wanting God to say, "Okay, Case, here you go. Here's your life...exactly how you wanted it to happen. No twists and turns anymore. You got it...just the way you like."

Ummmmm.

Maybe I should except the fact that life was never meant to be the way I thought it was going to be.

Guess what? I'm awake now!

It's late...I mean early!

Well...it's past 3:00 in the morning and for some odd reason I'm wide awake. Maybe it's those three cups of caffene I guzzled down today. Just a thought. I really have nothing profound to say. What a surprise right? Does anyone's mind actually function well at 3am? The only thing I'm really good for right now is the ability to giggle at almost anything which might boost someone's self esteem. I guess that counts for something.

Good night...I mean morning...to all my peeps out there. It's good to be blessed.

Ashley and Jordan

So far from home,
they ventured away.
My heart was torn,
but could not ask them to stay.

"I love you so much!"
I wished them farewell.
My Ashley and Jordan,
so many good things to tell!

"Wish they could be here",
Mindy and I spoke with care.
But don't worry my friends,
more adventures we'll share!

God has given you favor,
and your faith makes you strong.
Just remember we love you,
and in our hearts you'll always belong!

Love you both and miss you very much!!! :)

The Power of Encouragement

What is it about encouragement that makes one believe they can do anything? Words really are life or death. If someone believes in me it makes me want to rise to any challenge and soar. If someone tears me down I want to dig myself a little hole and stay in it...forever.

I was pondering last night. Everything we say needs to be seasoned with love. When we rebuke a brother or sister in Christ it needs to be through love and done in a way that builds them up. I know for myself when someone points out a flaw in me I receive it so much better when they do it in a way of encouragement. When they show me that they believe in me and my character. When someone believes in me, believes in who I am inside, I want to do all that I can to live up to that standard.

Thoughts to think about. Do my words really make that much of a difference in someone's life? Do I build up or do I tear down? Am I an encourager or an enforcer? Do I love or do I judge? It's important to hold each other accountable. When I see someone slipping into something that will harm them it's my duty to save them...because I love them. I am just as much a sinner as anyone else. So when I rebuke someone I'm knowing in my heart that I could be sitting right where they are at. What would I want to hear? What would make me want to turn from sin?

Love.

Mornings

I love the morning. I love getting up early when it's quiet, peaceful and almost light. When the birds are just starting to chirp and the dew is heavy on the earth. I can hear God whispering in the morning. I can feel His breath and hear his heart. I think He likes the mornings too. I sit and drink a cup of coffee and read the Word and everything just seems to fall into place. God is there (most likely drinking some coffee as well) and He's grateful that I'm with Him, enjoying His presence.

I ran this morning as well. Its interesting...running that is. It's interesting to me how I actually get myself in the car, drive to Rita's and run. I don't really like to run. I like the feeling afterwards, but I hate it while I'm doing it. But, I decided to start running for the fact that I don't like to do it. It's pushes me beyond my comfort zone and too often in this world we only aim for the things that please us. When my legs and lungs start burning I start thinking to myself what Jesus went through as He stumbled through the streets heading for his death. If He can endure the Cross, surely I can endure the pain of running. Surely I can stretch myself a little bit and learn to discipline myself in things I don't necessarily like to do.

I'm not sure what peaceful mornings and running have to do with eachother but...there it is. I'm about to head off to SOU to register for my classes and I'm...excited. Its nice to be excited instead of fearful. It's nice to anticipate something in a good way. You know what...it's nice to just be alive.

Home

Well, I'm back home. It's good to be back. I had a great time in Seattle though. Lots of funny moments and time to just sit and reflect. Lots of Starbucks (okay maybe too much Starbucks) and lots of yummy food, friends and randomness. I love randomness!

It's funny how we try to squeeze God in a tiny little box. I mean, we all know we do it but sometimes it just hits me. He really doesn't ever do the thing I expect Him to do. But it's way cool to just sit back and see what He does do. I love how He orchestrates so many different things together, it makes my head hurt to try and think about it. He's been doing that a lot lately, blowing my mind. When I actually take the time to open my eyes to the little things He does all day long it's crazy. It's wonderful. It's exhilirating. It's...passionate. It's so much better than what I would come up with!

"Jesus...thanks for being You. Thanks for being random. Thanks for making me feel alive and for doing things in a complete mind blowing way! Thanks for taking care of the little things, the big things, the things I hold onto and don't want to let go of. You take care of it all and do it in a way that makes me laugh, makes me sing and makes me wanna spin around and shout for joy! You are amazing!"

Seattle...Day 5

Just got done doing pilates with my friend Deanna and about six other women I've never met. Very entertaining to say the least. Good times. Now we are back in her apartment getting ready for the day. I think we might catch a chick flick and who knows what else. Probably pretty chill. I leave tomorrow. Head back to GP...say goodbye to Seattle for who knows how long. It's kind of sad. But, I'm happy to be coming home as well.

The sun is hiding again today. I can't really tell if my mood matches the weather or if the weather some how matches my mood. I'm sure its not the latter, but its nice to think the world revolves around me sometimes. :)

I feel like God's testing me. Have you ever felt like that? Have you ever felt the hand of God on you, knowing He's just waiting to see what you do?

It's pleasing to serve the Lord. Good to obey His commands and follow His precepts. The righteous will be lifted up in due time. At the proper time. In God's time. It's good to wait upon the Lord.

Hard...but good.

Seattle...Day 4

It's getting late and my mind is mush. Not much to say this evening. Or maybe too much to say I just don't know where to start. Lots on the mind I suppose. Another good day though. A great day.

Seattle...Day 3

I wish at times I could have lunch with someone random...just sit there and listen to what they have to say. I sit at a small table, outiside Bell Square, and write notes on my new red-mini calender I purchased at Barnes and Noble. It's quite cute. I watch the people walk by. I wonder where they are going and why. A few people smile at me as I sit alone, but most just walk by with a false look of determination. Is where they are heading really all that important? Does walking faster make one seem like they have more of a purpose?

An elderly lady sits close by and fiddles with her cell phone. She looks perplexed. I wonder how long she's actually owned a cell phone or if it's even hers. Her grandaughters maybe? I take a swig from my Starbucks White Mocha and soak in the sun...are rare surprise here in Northern Washington. A pleasant one though.

I hear my phone beep...it's my friend Emmy. She wants me to have curry with her and her mom tonight. I accept. Mmm...curry.

I grab my stuff and start walking down the street. I hear a band in the distance and go to check it out. I laugh. It's sidewalk rock-a-roke (the intense hard core version of karoke I would presume.) I sit and listen to three people make fools of themselves and love every minute of it. I applaud their courage.

It's nice today. Pleasant. I feel good. I enjoy this time alone. I smile. I say something to God, something that only He would understand. We both smile. Today is good.

Seattle...Day 2

Everything happens for a reason. I'm really starting to believe this. God works everything together for the good of those who love Him. What safety there is in knowing that all things work together for good...our mistakes, our joys, our fears, our passions, our dreams, our failures and our histories...they all work together to make something good, something beautiful, something unique and God inspired.

My friends car broke down today so we bummed around the car lot, talked to the sales people, walked down the street, and then went to an outlet near by. Not what we had planned but it turned out...good. Everything happens for a reason.

I am blessed. I have probably the best friends in the world. I am surrounded by such great people it amazes me at times. I am enriched everyday just by spending time with them. The things I fear pale in comparison to the joys I find in the simple things. Is it possible to be blessed more than I already am? What satisfies? What's the one thing that will complete me? What is it that I'm waiting for? I already have everything I need...anything more is just icing on the cake.

Seattle...Day 1

Blog mania! Isn't this fun? I love to read and write...why didn't I ever do this before? Ashley Nay...you silly girl! She is amazing isn't she?

Seattle. The land of rain, volcanoes, malls and Starbucks. Nothing calls to me more than the possiblity of having a latte in hand while reading a good book. This is what I call a vacation. Spice it up with some great friends and you've got yourself a real treat. Uh huh.

I sit in my friends apartment in downtown Bellevue, Washington, with the sound of cars in the distance and Jeremy Camp playing ever so softly. The clouds have not dissapointed...they are a reliable piece of Washington that greet me with open arms. However, as I sit in a somewhat pensive mood today I enjoy the grey. What is it about having our moods match the weather? Is God pensive with me? Or does He just understand?

Again I keep hearing the word 'surrender'. It always comes back to that doesn't it? Surrender, trust, patiently waiting for God's best. Surrender..."to relinquish possession or control of to another...to give up or back that which has been granted...the act of giving up one's person or possession's into the authority of another or relinquishing one's power, aims or goals". Ouch. This is according to the American Heritage Dictionary on the word 'surrender'.

Jeremy Camps song on surrender plays perfectly on cue. Lord, are you trying to say something? Hmmm.

"Father, give me the strength to believe. Give me the strength to walk by faith. Give me the courage to risk, to love and to trust."